My Surprise Vacation

You know, in all honesty, Mr. Bissell did warn us that this might happen. He said "Chinese people like to make plans quickly, so keep asking your family what they are doing for Shi Yi (Chinese national holiday) so that you don't get woken up one morning and told to get in the car." I knew it was going to happen, but I only asked my parents once (a week ago) and when I got nothing as a response, I took their word for it. But silly me. (And now the explanation for why I have been missing in action for 2 days...)

On Wednesday morning, I woke up at 8, just in time for my sister to knock on the door and say "Sophie, get up. We are leaving..." At this point, our memories of the situation diverge. I thought she said we were going shopping with some friends, but apparently she said "We are going on a day long drive to Shanxi province (2 provinces over) to see some temples, and we are staying the night, so pack some clothes." Don't ask me how I screwed that up, because in all honesty, I have no idea myself. All I know was that she told me this about 10 seconds after I woke up, and I am not at my best in the morning.

My first clue should have been the obscene amounts of food that my parents had shoved into plastic bags for our car ride. At the time, that didn't make sense to me, but now, I have seen the light. Thankfully, my host mom told me that we "may" be staying the night, so I put an extra pair of underwear and socks into my little skull and crossbones bag, and grabbed my Jimmy Eat World hoodie. If we really had been going shopping, I would have been totally ready.

I still thought we were going shopping when we drove over to a friends house to pick them up (in their car. We were going to do a follow the leader thing, apparently.) There was a girl about 11 years old with the family, and at first glance, she was seriously the cutest thing ever. She kept calling me Sophie 姐姐 (which means older sister) and really, it was adorable. The only downside was that she would speak really fast Chinese to me, and expect me to understand it, which of course, I couldn't. And when she and Qian Hui (my sister) got into the back seat together, I still didn't realize we weren't going shopping. Duh.

My first huge clue was after we had been driving for 2 hours, and we passed out of the gate of our province, and into HeBei (河北). Then I was patting myself on the back for putting an extra pair of underwear in my bag. I fell asleep at some point, and when I woke up around lunch time, we were pulling into this really sketch city for lunch. (Seriously, if it had been in America, you would be running away from it as fast as your car could take you.) Now, I definitely knew we were going on a trip.

We ended up eating lunch at this dirty looking restaurant, and I really didn't like any of the food that my mom ordered, so I just filled myself up on rice, and thought of the food in the plastic bags sitting in the backseat of the car. We all made a trip over to KFC (the nicest restaurant in town. I kid you not.) to use the restroom (which was squatting, by the way. Yuck.) and then we hopped back in the car and took off. I still had no idea where we were going.

We drove for the rest of the day, making occasional toilet stops. (For some reason, they call toilets here WC. So instead of saying, "Do you need to use the toilet?" they say "Do you need to go the WC?" I asked my mom why, and she had no idea. Weird much?) It really struck me how poorly some people live. We passed through coal areas, and there were people crouching in the coal dust, looking like they had been doing it all their lives. The towns we drove through were horrible, and I think I would have killed myself if I lived there. It also struck me how lucky I was to even be able to drive a car, much less have one, and how rottenly spoiled I am at home. I love you, mom and dad. Really. Don't get me wrong. (On another note, my dad's driving has gone up a notch in my book. Although he is still a terrifying driver, he maneuvers the car quite expertly, and with practiced skill, especially on the dirt roads we drove on. I doubt there are many people in America that could handle the roads we drive on every day. It is pretty impressive.)

Finally, after it had been dark for hours, we arrived at our destination. WuTaiShan (五台山) or Wu Tai Mountain, the famous home of over 120 temples. (I think that my parents believe I had a religious experience at the Llama Temple, because when I came home with prayer bead bracelets on my arms, they went nuts. I immediately met the uncle, who told me how to get things blessed at the temple, and who gave me a book on the Llama Temple, and they have been showing everyone my bracelets. Then we drive for a day out to a famous temple. I don't know how to tell them I only bought the bracelets because I thought they looked pretty.)

The first order of business was to find a place to stay. (I would just like to point out that when we got there, it was 7 C and I was wearing a short sleeve shirt and a hoodie. I was all for finding a room fast.) We went down this alley way to what I guess you would call a hotel. It was just a bunch of rooms off a hallway. One whole side of each room was windows onto the hallway, so you had to pull a curtain across it at night. It is actually a good thing that we got there when we did, because if we had been any later, we wouldn't have gotten a room (as it was, we fought with another family for a while before we got 3 rooms - one for the other family, one for my sister and me, and one for my parents.) Once we got settled in, it was dinner time.

We went to another sketch restaurant, but this one was a little cleaner at least. All of the restaurants are smoker friendly, so my dad kept lighting up in the middle of all our meals. (I swear, if I smell any more smoke in the next 24 hours, I may have to kill someone.) I again ate an unseemly amount of rice, along with one other dish that I liked, and then we all went back to the "hotel" to sleep.

On the bright side, that hotel stay was probably the easiest stay I have ever had, mostly because I didn't bring clothes or bathroom stuff with me. I simply slept in the only shirt I had, and in the morning, changed my underwear, put my bra back on, and away we went. It wasn't an unpleasant experience, just something I wouldn't want to do again. (It was also discovered at the early point of 7 that our toilet didn't flush. Clearly, this was a quality establishment.) We had breakfast at the same place we ate dinner (we had this fried dough thing and bread buns) and then the touring started. Somewhere along the way, we picked up a guide, and she took us to various temples around the area. I think we went to 5, or so. The first couple weren't too impressive; they just looked like regular temples.

We went to one on the top of a hill that was pretty spectacular. We rode on horses up the hill, which was fun. Haven't done that for a while. Although these definitely weren't thoroughbreds, and I doubt that they got supplements every night. Once at the top of the hill, we had to walk up still more steps to get to the actual temple. But the view was incredible. Because it was on top of the hill, we could see the whole valley stretched out before us. (Don't worry, I got pictures.) We walked around the temple (someone asked if they could take a picture with me. In all fairness, I was getting a lot of stares, probably because I was the only foreigner in a 100 miles radius), and my sister taught me how to bow in a temple after lighting incense. You have to bow 3 times to the North, South, East and West. I felt like such a prat. After that, we left. On the way, we got sidetracked by a performing monkey, and it jumped into my hands (for 5 kuai) and let me take a picture with it. It was pretty funny, and drew a crowd. We rode horses down the hill as well (I got a white one this time), bought ice creams, and took off again. This time, I think we went to the most famous temple. I don't know what it was called, but there was a huge white tower in the middle, and all around the bottom were prayer wheels, which you spin to earn prayers and good fortune (I spun them all. I should be lucky for the next couple of days.)

After another picture with a random Chinese person, and more pictures with my family, my parents declared it time to move on. No more temples for us though. We were headed for 天生桥 (Tian Sheng Qiao) or Bridge under the Sky. It's a waterfall 120ft up, that has carved a bridge like thing it flows under. But first, lunch. By the time we left the temples, it was about 11, and we were driving again. 2 hours away, we found another sketch restaurant to eat in. (This is also the first place I have found that literally has a hole in the ground for the bathrooms. I mean it literally when I say public toilets in America will never EVER gross me out again.) We had a huge pork stew thing for lunch, which was surprisingly good, and after my dad had 2 more cigarettes, we were off to the waterfalls. By the time we got there, it was about 2:30, and I was already thinking of the 6 hour car ride we had back to Beijing.

The waterfall was well worth it, though. We took a gondola up to it (when we were getting in, my sister and I banged our heads together. It was fine though, and she started teaching me how to say things in Chinese on the ride, which was nice.) We saw the waterfall as we approached in our gondola, and it was beautiful. Because it was so high, the water fell in wisps, and everything was green and beautiful. I can't describe it here without sounding like a total prat, but I will send pictures if you ask.

After an absurd amount of pictures of the waterfall from every angle, we walked back down the mountain instead of taking the gondola. My mom walked with me for the most part. She seemed concerned that I wasn't learning Chinese fast enough, and so she talked with me all the way down. Once we reached the bottom, my family and the other family split up (ie we got back in our own cars) and started driving back to Beijing. (Fact of the day. The mom of the other family and my mom have been friends since middle school. How crazy is that?) It was a long car ride, so I got comfortable, and I am pretty sure that I went to sleep. But it is rather hard to stay asleep when the car swerves a lot, and the driver has a fetish for the horn. Instead, I just listened to music with my sister, and looked out the window.

We stopped at 7 for dinner, in the same town that we had had lunch in the day before. Upon first glance, the restaurant didn't seem so bad. Probably the best one we had eaten at. But then, we saw the menu. My mom said "This is a donkey restaurant." What now?

So they ordered donkey. I couldn't and wouldn't eat it. I rode horses for 7 years, and I rode a horse just that day, so forgive me if I didn't want to eat its cousin. That didn't seem very nice. Everyone else dug in though. Instead, my family ordered me a lamb stew, bing (which is a really good pita thing) and a wheat stew, which is also really bloody good. I just watched everyone else eat donkey face. They thought that it was hysterical that I wouldn't eat it, but I apologized profusely and explained that we don't eat donkey in America, and that I just couldn't handle it. (I did say that when my parents arrived, they would try exotic foods though. Sorry guys.)

Here is a tip for when you come to Beijing. Don't ever go and see the kitchen. Ever. Because if you do, I can just about guarantee that you will never eat again. I had to go to the bathroom which was close to the kitchen, and if I had seen it before my meal, I would never have eaten. I'm just surprised we aren't dead.

We had a 3 hour car ride home, and by this point, I was getting grouchy. I was dirty (no shower for 3 days), I couldn't get comfortable, and I was bloody tired of that stupid backseat of the car. So you can understand my absolute delight for seeing our apartment building come into view. I think everyone breathed a sigh of relief that our trip was over. Not that it wasn't fun (it was) just that it was nice to be done with. Jerry, our dog, was especially happy to see us (he had been living with Grandma, and we had to pick him up on our way home.)

I got the first shower when we got home, and a shower has never felt so good. I thanked my parents for taking me on the vacation, and went to bed. Now, the next morning, I am finally done. So, everyone, that is why I have been MIA for 2 days. (I didn't know I was going on vacation, and then my phone died. It was great.) I realize this probably wasn't the best blog entry ever, but I can live with that. Talk to you in 12 hours.